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 Lesson No. 2: Oh My God I've Been Fired!! You probably will be fired at least once in your life. This may sound harsh, but studies show that the average American worker will hold up to 10 jobs in his or her lifetime (10.8 to be exact!) Companies call it laying off, downsizing, synergizing, reorganizing-take your pick. No matter what they call it, you still feel like you've been fired. Certainly there are different degrees of termination, ranging from early retirement to being escorted out the door. When a job ends, some people are happy as larks, while others may go into a deep depression. Either way, the common ground is that a firing or dismissal results in the loss of a sense of purpose. Unfortunately, I speak from experience-I was fired and it wasn't pretty. In late 1999, I moved from West Orange, New Jersey to San Antonio, Texas. Prior to starting a job at the U.S. Attorney's office in San Antonio, I had approximately five months of leave that enabled me to stay home. While unpacking and organizing my new home, I religiously watched The Living Show, a local program that targets women, many of them stay-at-home moms, and features special guests like representatives from the Humane Society and other organizations. I always wanted to be an informative newscaster, and it occurred to me one day that I could do it-go on The Living Show as a guest speaker and talk about crime prevention, particularly as it relates to women (i.e., date rape, abuse, credit card fraud, scams). Lo and behold, the producer bought into my idea, and I was on the air the next week. (Mini-lesson: if you ever go on television, whether you are a man or woman, hire a professional make-up artist. Also, consult with someone at the station regarding what to wear, and most importantly, what not to wear-stripes, patterns, paisley-what are commonly referred to in the industry as "busy" clothes. During my first show, I wore my regular make-up and a pink suit. Later that day, I rushed home to see the video of the segment. Much to my chagrin, I looked like a creature from Tales of The Crypt. Immediately thereafter, I found and hired a wonderful professional make-up artist, Yvette Parrish, who did my make-up so well that when I sent a videotape of the next segment to my dad, he didn't recognize me.) About a year into my guest appearances on The Living Show, a start-up television station was hiring Anchors/Reporters. I interviewed for and secured one of the positions, leaving behind a very stable position at the United States Attorney's Office in San Antonio. Unfortunately, six months into my new job at the start-up station, several other employees and I were fired. I must tell you that it was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. I was instructed to pack my belongings, wait in a room for a prolonged period, and was subsequently escorted out of the station. It was like a nightmare, and I couldn't believe it was happening to me. For weeks, I could barely get out of bed in the morning. In addition, I was amazed at how some people treated me like I had the bubonic plague when they learned that I was fired and didn't have a job. After a few weeks of feeling sorry for myself, I decided I had to do something about my depressing situation. First and foremost, I prayed and asked my friends and family to pray for me. Thereafter, I woke up early every morning and dressed like I was going to work. I wore a suit, pearls, and put on perfume. By looking better-guess what-I felt better. Furthermore, I created and stayed on a daily routine-sending my kids to school, preparing healthy meals, walking at least a mile, conducting my house chores, and completing at least one errand per day. I networked and became active in the Federal Bar Association and several other organizations. I even started my own business and named it Hill Country Public Relations. I registered the name for about thirty dollars and purchased business cards for about twenty dollars-together, the best fifty dollars I've ever spent. I was astonished at the different reactions I got when I handed people my business card and told them that I owned my own business. Also, I ran the company from my previous house and the card read: Yvette Mouton, Esq. No one needs to know that your office is run from your home. A business card adds a classy touch and exudes professionalism. In addition to running my business, I volunteered and helped my friends and family when I had spare time. I realized later that the time I spent wallowing in self-pity could've been better spent taking care of personal business. In case of a job hiatus, I suggest that you use your time wisely by establishing or updating your will, organizing your important papers, creating an emergency family plan, creating your grab-and-go safe box, and doing all of the things that you didn't have time to do when you were working. Listen to inspirational or upbeat music, like Marvin Sapp or Coldplay, and go to lunch or a movie with friends or family. If money is tight, there are plenty of free activities at local libraries, churches, stores, community centers, parks, and schools. In short, it is critical that you have positive diversions and not spend all of your time dwelling on your unemployment status. When you do find that new job (and you will), start looking for your next one, because there are no guarantees in life. It is critical to diversify your network base and to develop at least two skill sets. After I graduated from Georgetown in 1982, I ate, drank, and breathed the law. Virtually all of my friends and colleagues were attorneys. I needed to branch out. Luckily, through the good fortune of working at the U.S. Attorney's office under former Secretary of Homeland Security Michael Chertoff, I found myself engaged with a diverse group of professionals-particularly politicians. You may not like politics, but it is imperative that you stay engaged in the process and become informed about local, state, federal, and international issues. For example, I try to watch Gwen Ifill on PBS and listen to NPR on a regular basis. Stay strong and trust that, at the end of the day, you will survive losing your job even though it may feel like torture while you are trying to find a new one. No matter what happens, keep the faith, create your own job, volunteer, and stay engaged across the board. Lesson No. 2: You Will Be Fired And You Will Survive!!
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